The oppression of sexuality in the 19th century middle class started with pre-modern monasteries and nunneries. In practice they functioned as sex-segregated collectives. There people could isolate themselves from society their entire lives. Heterosexuals saw no opportunity to ever get sex themselves. At the same time they knew sex was necessary for reproduction. (Artificial insemination was not developed until the 18th century.) Out of own frustration everything was condemned other than unprotected sexual intercourse. Preferably it should moreover be within marriage. Dads long did not support mums unless they were married to each other.
This also applied to Catholic priests during at least parts of the Middle Ages. (They went from marrying to compulsory celibacy to cohabitation.) Such could express themselves in the same way as monks. At least some expressed themselves in a way which was ambiguous. Condemnations could be interpreted as applying to withdrawal, oral and anal sex. But they could also be interpreted as condemning masturbation. Something European for long rarely payed attention to.
To that came the myth of universal evilness which originated in monasteries and nunneries too. Monks and nuns came from circumstances having prevented them from learning much about others. In the same way they had no idea about the limits of the humanly possible. In frustration over own failures they placed impossible demands on others. At the same time they only knew that some did not live up to their demands. All other were supposed to do so just because demands were made. Add the myth of the Fall. Then one get the belief that all humans naturally want to be evil. That only a small number of the preached to would live out their evilness. No-one of those ideas makes any sense to me.
In the 17th century it was noted that some mentally ill often masturbated. No-one had any idea of how common masturbation was. It is completely normal human behaviour. However, people still frequently believed that the unknown to them did not exist. At least for human behaviour and mental characteristics. Personal ignorance led to the idea that masturbation was something abnormal. People imagined masturbation would lead to mental illness. Cause and effect were conflated due to ignorance about others. Those poor mental patients had not become mad because they masturbated. They were often seen masturbating because they were mad.
The belief in universal evilness mutated into the myth of the contagious sin. Unwanted behaviours were believed to spread just because they were unwanted. In the 19th century people had begun to understand that everyone could not self-evidently meet all demands. But which demands were impossible they still had a poor grasp of. At the same time urbanisation made demands on self-control increase. The middle class applied economic thinking on all kinds of behaviours. Many tried to prevent everything they did not know was needed. Add the previously mentioned belief in the myth of the contagious sin. Then one gets attempts to hide that something unwanted even existed. By hiding this to children they were belied prevented from developing it.
Something the middle class did not realise was needed was masturbation. To the opposite more and more started to believe it to be harmful. Children were threatened with malformations if they touched their genitals. Parents discovering their children which had reached puberty were masturbating did everything to stop it. Many claimed to be older chastity belts were made in the 19th century. At least such things seem to have barely occurred before that. Metal barriers around the genitals could be made part of underwear. Which the wearers would then also have on when they would go to sleep. Such compulsions must have caused much pain and sexual frustration.
This on top of a hostile attitude towards everything other than unprotected sexual intercourse within steady relationships. All other types of sex were officially condemned. People would start having sex shortly after their wedding ceremony. Then they would stop entirely when they had all the children they wanted. Moreover this was seen as something one should struggle oneself to. A struggle which in reality was almost always lost. Few couples can stop having sex when they did not want children anymore. Either they get more children than they can take proper care of. Or they so have such sex which can’t result in children. Something people rarely confessed they actually had.
Then there were attempts to hide sex existing at all. In particular this applied to teenage gals. The middle class tried to keep them ignorant about this before the wedding ceremony. As if sexuality would come from knowing that sex exists. In fact it is a combination of hormones and mental maturity. Nearly everyone having turned 20 feel a natural need to use their genitals in some way. However, we don’t naturally know how sex is normally done. The later is something we have to be taught.
For guys it was rather hiding before they had become adult. Far too many had a steady relationship no earlier than when they were around 40. From them being young adults they had instead bought sex. There being gals selling sex they would otherwise turn a blind eye to. Usually it was unprotected sex with gals being prostitutes. This meant considerable risk to contact sexually transmitted diseases. Something in and of itself causing problems. When men had wedding ceremonies gals around 20 were handed over to them to rape. It did not help when gals were forced solely on economic grounds. Without consideration of personal characteristics it becomes an emotional lottery. However, the middle class imagined that emotions would be optional too.
Maybe worst was denial of female sexuality. In 1827 it was discovered women can get pregnant without enjoying sex. The possible was then mistaken for what ought to be done. The middle class begun to imagine that women should be asexual. That they must be incapable of feeling any sexual desire at all. Then they could be handed over to men twice their age. Men they did not find sexually attractive and likely carried sexually transmitted disease. Gals as such were forced into sexual relationships. Such abuse of power made it convenient to deny women’s sexuality. Expressions of their sexuality could be pathologised at need. Same thing with their very normal reactions to their husbands’ behaviour.
All this was done in the belief that everything uneconomical has to go. This continued in some circles well into the 20th century. People tried to rid themselves of all use of genitals except just to have kids. But humans don’t work like that. Which led to behaviours seen as even worse. I think that was explained away by one not having tried hard enough. This is a common excuse for a method not working.
This is a pattern repeating time after time over history. People try to oppress some part of human nature. That in the belief the oppression would solve what they see as problems. The very same inborn characteristic will then leap back and instead worsen the problem. Or the supposed problem since it does not have to be so. Many characteristics are no problem unless they are made into. Of cause there are characteristics which can cause other problems. Then I promote strategies for compensating for our flaws. We will never get rid of them anyway.
Uploaded on the 4th of September 2026.
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